Sunday, March 21, 2010

Another weekend of running...and why am I still up?

Why do we wear ourselves out in the service of our God? Ok, other than the obvious, "because we are suppose to"? Because we love Him? Yep, check. Because we love the people we are serving? Yep, check. Because we are suppose to? Yep, check. Sigh... I'm ok with the first two. But I'm really tired of the "suppose to" one. Because when I fallback to that, I get a little bitter about what I am doing, and really, I'm motivated by the other two just as much, but there is still a part of me that...yes, you can see I'm conflicted by this.

I am constantly amazed at the amount of service that is provided by the ladies (and men) and church. And they do it with a smile and with love. And they keep on giving and giving. Of their time, their talents and their resources. Never stopping. It is amazing. Literally, I spent more time at church this weekend than I did at home--and I watched these people serve and serve and serve. They were in the temple, at the Stake Center, at church today teaching classes. I got to do simply celestial things thanks to the efforts of others.

Me? I'm pregnant. I find that I am short on patience and energy. I do what I can, but wish it were more and better, but then I realize, I need a nap! I know that as the Mom I do my thing there, but wow, we sure do have a lot that is expected of us. And we expect a lot more from ourselves perhaps than we should. I'm going to post Mosiah 4:27 on my wall and I suggest all you pregos out there do the same (or new moms, old moms, aunts, uncles, grandmas and overachieving Mormons, you KNOW who you are).
And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order.

I'm going to try for some wisdom and order. Or order and wisdom. Whichever comes first.